Now I know why all Quilters smoke like 3 packs a day*
It's because of all these quilts that they feel like they really should make for everybody because they can. I've started to twitch, myself, every time somebody says they're pregnant. Thank the good lord hisself that only one dear friend and one relative is at this time currently about to pop. Because if anybody else I knows gets knocked up, I'm going to be SERIOUSLY BEHIND, people.
And what about christmas? Oh my Heavenly Day, what about Christmas? Now that I can hand quilt, how in the name of Carol Brady's underpaid hairstylist am I going to pull off hand-sewn quilts for everybody? So many things to quilt. Maybe I'll make table runners for everybody instead of full quilts. Or napkins. Or little covers for everybody's USB drive. Yeah yeah, that's what I'll do. Yeah.
Plus, what about my kids--they each need a hand-sewn quilt from me. I need to make each of them quilts. I mean, I did, but I need to HAND-QUILT something for them now--something that they can have forEVER. That's totally what I need to do, man. It's totally what I need to do.
I'm so wound up, I just need a project to calm me down. I'll quilt something--yeah, that's what I need to do, I need to quilt something so that I can calm down from all this Quilting Pressure.
Mom, what's for dinner?
What honey--oh. Yes. Right. Uhhhhh--Be there in a second, honey! Just working out some inner tension up here. Just working on some quilllltttsssss.
I hate letting my kids down. So stressful. Uhhhh. Gotta do something to relax--I'll quilt.
[Insert photo of bloodied finger from too much interaction with tiny hand-stitch needle here.]
*Quilters don't smoke 3 packs a day. But if you see a Quilter madly lighting up with the tip of a just-burned cigarette, don't judge. That person has a lot going on inside and maybe needs the nicotine just to deal with the real pressure of being able to quilt.